In Paris and New York, I would, from time to time, wander around S&M and swingers clubs with a hidden camera, in pursuit of a dream of dissolution, harmony, and collective ecstasy. As a creator of illusion, I’m concerned with truth. And for me these are places of truth, like mental hospitals and battlefields.

In such places, reality is heightened – is sometimes violent – but human interactions are mostly tender and sincere. Strictly speaking, there is little in the way of purely sexual pleasure. As if, strangely, pleasure wasn’t to be found where we most expect it.

Jean-Christian Bourcart
Forbidden City

a surprising paradox

November 5, 2017


Although most boys figure out how to bring themselves to orgasm by age thirteen, half of girls don’t have their first orgasms until their late teens, twenties, or beyond. Teenage girls widely agree that they get the message loud and clear that masturbation is something boys do, but girls don’t, can’t, or shouldn’t. The cultural focus on intercourse tells young women to expect they’ll begin to experience sexual pleasure once they have sex with a man (whether or not they’re even interested in sex with men). Nearly all teen boys, on the other hand, experience sexual pleasure long before they get their hands – or other body parts – into a partner’s pants. Despite the massive advances in women’s equality, young women’s sexuality is stuck in a surprising paradox. Young women are sold provocative clothes but aren’t taught where to find their own clitoris. Many girls give their boyfriends oral sex, but are too uncomfortable with their own bodies to allow the guys to return the favour. It’s still a radical act to say that women need and deserve access to information about their own sexual pleasure – not just about the risks and negative consequences of sex.

Dorian Solot
I Love Female Orgasm: An Extraordinary Orgasm Guide

Nasty, raunchy things

January 17, 2016


If I say I’m going to fuck you, it means I am going to do filthy, nasty, raunchy things with your body for sexual pleasure. If I say I am going to make love to you, it means I’m going to kiss you and look you in the eyes while I do them…