Halloween…and that tapping on my door

Today, of course, is All Hallows’ Eve (Halloween), also known as All Saints’ Eve (so good we named it twice).

It’s a day in part derived from the Gaelic festival of Samhain, celebrating the end of summer, the lighter half of the year, and the onset of the darker half of the year, winter – Summer births, winter deaths. It is a time when the very fabric separating us from the unseen otherworld becomes so thin that the dead are able to reach back into this world of the living. In the ancient festival of Samhain, in Ireland, it was customary to hollow out turnips, carving a face on them to create lanterns that would frighten off the dangerous spirits…

But today irritating little monsters  children appear on the twilit streets, their faces hidden by plastic masks as they go door to door, calling: “Trick or Treat!”, their raucous yells putting the fear of God up little old ladies who live alone. Neither parents or kids have any real understanding of the history behind their dressing up – the pagan implications, the appeasement of the dead, the spirits moving into this world from the otherworld.

Nor I suspect do they have much comprehension of the Christian meaning behind All Hallows: the celebration on first November honoring all the Christian saints, both known and unknown…the spiritual communion between the living and those who have died in a state of grace to face purification in purgatory or their arrival in heaven.

Across Europe people visit the graves of deceased relatives and friends with flowers or lighted candles. The day coincides with “Día de los Inocentes“, the first day celebrating “Dia de los Muertos”, the day of the dead. “Día de los Inocentes” is for the children who have died, honoring their spirits and praying for their continued peace in the otherworld…

So parents, one and all, be aware what little Jonnie is about in the dark, in the night, all bundled up in his coat and scarf: he’s inviting the spirits from the otherworld into this one, perhaps; and as he and his friends scream “Trick or Treat” at some palpitating pensioner, ask yourself:

“What is that shape moving just now in the shadows behind them?”

God bless the EU…

So our blessed Coagulation has agreed an increase in the EU budget. And at a time when budgets are being cut across all government departments!?

Wonderful…or should that be Wunderbar ?

Die Welt headlines: “Merkle asserts her will in Brussels”. Spiegel on the other hand proudly declares: “Europe comes up against the iron chancellor” comparing the dear lady to chancellor Otto Von Bismarck, who, you may recall, once stated:

“The great questions of the time will not be resolved by speeches and majority decisions…but by iron and blood.”

He went on to wage war in turn against Denmark, Austria and France, and remarked about the Polish people “if we want to survive – we’ve got only one option – to exterminate them” – a true “European” indeed.

So, my little luvies, think on this when you’re next in the Job Centre. The coagulation have agreed an increase of £380 million to the Eurocrats. That money could have been used to create:

6,022 NHS doctors

12,666 NHS nurses

14,636 police constables

30 Harrier jump-jets (for those aircraft-less aircraft carriers!)

Or given me the holiday of a bloody lifetime!

Instead it’s to be given to Eurocrats to piss up the wall spend wisely on further European quangos initiatives such as the European External Action Service, or Europol, or one of the other shit worthless bits of bureaucracy necessary European incentives!

But it doesn’t end there. Oh, no! Word is that next year (2011) around the middle of the year, the Eurocrats will ask for another increase…watch this space!

Stripsody

For me, this says it all…enjoy.

Diana Gamet performs Berberian

Austria 2

Alpine Marmot, Grossglockner...my new friend!

Wild flowers with Edelweiss

 

We were a long way up in the mountains...

Roast Hedgehog

So I include here, for those of you stuck for fresh culinary ideas for the weekend, an interesting (Medieval) recipe which your guests will probably never have encountered before:

“Hedgehog should have its throat cut, be singed and gutted, then trussed like a pullet, then pressed in a towel until very dry; and then roast it and eat with cameline sauce, or in pastry with wild duck sauce. Note that if the hedgehog refuses to unroll, put it in hot water, and then it will straighten itself.”

Le Menagier de Paris, J. Hinson (trans.)

My thanks to the wonderful Medieval cookery blog where I found this recipe.

My Best

I’ll do my best for god,
My best for the children,
My best for the animals,
And all the United Kingdom!

I’ll do my best in war,
And my best in love,
My best to everyone,
Not to push and shove.

I’ll do my best in politics,
My best with food,
My best with manners,
And not be rude!

It’s not a contest or rage,
To curse,
Which I write,
This verse.

The only thing I hope for,
Is the future,
It will be a test,
That’s why I’ll just have to do my best!

Lisa Tokely

Ever Wonder What Happened To The Little Mermaid?

BARBIE DOLL has her 50th birthday this year……

Small joke!

Eileen and her husband Bob went for counseling after 25 years of marriage.

When asked what the problem was, Eileen went into a passionate, painful tirade listing every problem they had ever had in the 25 years they had been married.

She went on and on and on: neglect, lack of intimacy, emptiness, loneliness, feeling unloved and unlovable, an entire laundry list of unmet needs she had endured over the course of their marriage.

Finally, after allowing this to go on for a sufficient length of time, the therapist got up, walked around the desk and after asking Eileen to stand, embraced her, unbuttoned her blouse and bra, put his hands on her breasts and massaged them thoroughly, while kissing her passionately as her husband Bob watched with a raised eyebrow!

Eileen shut up, buttoned up her blouse, and quietly sat down while basking in the glow of being highly aroused.

The therapist turned to Bob and said, ‘This is what your wife needs at least three times a week.. Can you do this?’

Bob thought for a moment and replied, ‘Well, I can drop her off here on Mondays and Wednesdays, but on Fridays, I play golf…

Advice from Job Centre to get a job “Put bag over head”…

Oh, dear me. It’s ALLEGED a young lady was advised to ”stand behind a wall” when applying for a job…”or put a paper bag over your face.” Maybe then she’d stand a better chance…

See it HERE.

I can’t believe that with all their training a Job Centre adviser made no mention of the CIRCUS during the interview?